Tuesday, July 2, 2019

Thousand eyes

I can't draw up the blinds because there are literally half naked people chilling on the terrace. I can't close all the blinds bc I can't cope with complete darkness in daytime. The old creep across the street comes out every hour or so and throws an intent look at my window (3 looks, kitchen, living room & bedroom). I've built a barrier to block the line of sight in the living room but still can't dodge when I'm in the kitchen. I can't base my life on someone else's gross behavior, but every time I caught him looking it's just TOO ICKY. It's TOO GROSS. I can't even stick my neck out the window without meeting someone's eyes. Fuck. It already feels like a surveillance state. Stop looking! STOP LOOKING!

I really need to fucking decide if I want another 3 or God forbid 6 years of city life. Granted, this is a narrow street. Granted, Paris has a lot more to offer. I just have to get through this. I just want some privacy, you know? How is that too much to ask? Fucking people everywhere just looking with their suspecting... assuming... creepy eyes!

Good God, save me.

I'm OK. Don't worry, Diary.

Fuck, fine. I'll close more blinds. Have some peace of mind.

There is nothing I can do to make these dimwits equally uncomfortable. I curse them, I guess that's it (for now).

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