Friday, June 22, 2018

Don't look, you fucking creeps


Now I have to keep my blinds closed even in the day because of the drooling old creep across the street. This pisses me off to no end because I'm not a passive aggressive person. I honestly want to strangle him but I can't. It's to be expected. What's worse than living in the city? There is no difference even if you own one of them million dollar penthouses, because of how narrow the streets are ( all of the streets in the whole of the world ) people will look blatantly. I know in a few years I'll be complaining about bugs, yard work and mosquito bites, but right now that's not so bad compared to this. This is fucking absurd. I really hate to be looked at by creeps. Fuck off!

I'm so mad, Diary. I got nothing from living in the city. The parks are occupied by hippies. They're just lying on the grass doing nothing all day every day. No. I won't accept it. Excellence is lost in here but alive elsewhere, scattered. I really have not gained anything by living in the city. I know that now. I get tired of looking at the tourists. I'm so incensed Oh My God.

You don't know how mad I was. To be forced to do something in reaction to the creeps... I... it's just so gross. I'm so done. It's summer so I'm extra mad. Every day I check the weather and it's always sunny for 7 days straight. This ain't like Seattle, Seattle cheated me. I went to Seattle in its rainiest season and it was sunny the whole month I was there. That was abnormal. But I chose this. I could've chosen Bilbao but I changed my mind at the last moment (wasting a plane ticket in the process). I knew about this. I had hope, that's why. I thought maybe I should experience a hippy metropolis for once. Well I have. It doesn't fit me. I yearn for privacy and nature as always. I'm stupid like that.

Diary I am extremely, EXTREMELY, HOPELESSLY OPTIMISTIC. I'm still like that. That's fine. What I can't stand is I was also wrong. Oh so wrong. I keep giving chances to things I know I don't like. It's time to trust myself- it's time to trust my own judgment. I bet that's it. I guess I didn't have enough confidence in my own judgment, that's why I believed the things I heard other people say. Well, no more. I am very confident in my own judgment now. Fuck other people's opinions. I won't subject myself to other people anymore, not once ever again.

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