The only side effect alcohol has on me seems to be... it makes me sleepy.
Other than that, I'm exceptionally calm and focused... no, focus is not the right word. Single-minded, I guess you would say.
Watching people get drunk and do stuff on TV, it's like watching an alien documentary. Am I supposed to have that reaction? I don't do that. I've seen people who do that. I never get talkative after drinking. It just makes me prefer... more silence.