Friday, November 17, 2017

Norwegian is actually pretty interesting .

I woke up crying today, for the first time, in here. I had a bad dream.

Cannibalism. One of my biggest fears. I dreamt about this group of nice, tame-looking women, just ordinary housewives with kids, living next to me. One day I found them in a mobile chatroom, like a convo in an app, anyway they were casually discussing eating people. Someone sent a picture to the group and these moms and wives were all saying "oh I can't wait to skin him" "my son loves this" etc. & they were talking about how to cook body parts and how to make people into furniture and leather goods.

I don't know HOW THE FUCK I came up with this in my dream. In fact first I have to question my fear of cannibalism. Even in my sleep I questioned myself - if I have picked up on something. Did I use to to know a well-hidden cannibal and I picked up on something? There were no signs.

Really, diary. I don't know any cannibal in my life, I don't live close to a site where such horror occurred, it doesn't appear in the news often... I just, I just don't know where to start. Oh God, this is how I become a vegan isn't it. But why? Where did I get the deep trembling fear of cannibalism? It truly is one of my greatest fears, Diary. I wonder if it's a warning. Do dreams like this just pop up out of the blue? Holy Hell. Do I look tasty to a cannibal, Diary? Holy hell. A cannibal is about to eat me?

Is someone going to drag me off the street in broad day light, put me in a van, take home and cook me? Why am I having this dream? It's so upsetting that I woke up crying. Think about it!

Again even in my sleep, I was third-personing. As open-minded as I want to be, it occurred to me that such stereotype is what's deterred me from going to Germany or learning German - German Cannibals! I just realized that deep in my mind, I think German is the language of the cannibals. Like, h'why, h'why is it not the language of the great musicians, the great philosophers, but cannibals? Because I have such fear of cannibals that it surpasses all others impressions!

Oh my God Diary. That dream was hell. Eating people- talking about eating people- I just can't take it. My heart faints. I just can't, Diary. I just can't!

Nothing should've triggered me to dream this.I honestly must be careful from now. It could legitimately be a warning.

Oh I took another look into Norwegian today. It made me change my mind. I still don't care for the crude Norse myths, but, this language is indeed fairly interesting.

That dream is haunting, man

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