Monday, July 17, 2017

retarded reply

I received a retarded reply today and I'm cringing too hard to not tell you about it.

People/kids who point out the retarded obvious, I really can't stand them. Most of the time I forget they exist. What a bliss.

It's that waitress in Japan who "taught" me how to use chopsticks.

It's the acupuncture practitioner who told me all about "Chi".

It's the shop assistants who tell me the exact same thing on the label.

It's the tourist in the Arab shop who told me don't be shy and come in.

It's this kid...

It's everyone who treats me like I can't understand the most basic of shit.

I know I must seem helpless or stupid. I must seem so. There is no other explanation. I'm not mad, diary. I'm not mad. I'm not mad that even though scarcely but without fail, I always scare off the wrong people, and the rest, the vast majority of the time, even when I'm grimacing, people can't tell I'm angry or even annoyed. I can't help it. I'm just saying. This general assumption of incredible incompetence is so uncharacteristic, yet I have to deal with it every day.

Think about it. I look so stupid that people interact with me that way. I can't. I really can't.

My anger management has amped up a bunch of levels in the past few years. In the past it would get me instantly incensed. Now I just have to tell you about it. Hopefully I won't even care in future days.

There probably are some very tough-looking women, oh yeah there are definitely. - Some very tough-looking women who want to show their soft side, you know? Show that they're not intimidating, they're not angry, and they don't have a problem.

I don't have those features, diary. There is no way. I wish I was a bald, bulky man, and when I walk into a place, I just demand the seriousness. I'd be fucking ripped. I'm not. When you think about it, it's fucked up I am this way.

Whatever. This life is still worth living, and we got shit to do.

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